Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

Life is a matter of choices, and every choice you make makes you. John C. Maxwell

Advice to my son as he gets married.  The world needs strong, good men. It always has needed them and it may need them even more as we face the challenges ahead of us. It isn’t easy being strong in a time when “toxic masculinity” is tossed around. We wouldn’t have the society we have if it wasn’t for strong good men. In saying that I am not saying women have not done their part. Men and women built this society, they stood up to tyranny, they stood up for what was right, and they’ve made mistakes.

Courage is one of the most important virtues it might even be the most important one because without courage how do we stand up for ourselves, others, those we love, and those we want justice for.

Good strong men are not our problem in society they are what is needed to keep us going on an even keel. I grew up with a good strong father who wanted a good life for all his children. Good people want a good life for all their children even the children that don’t fit neatly into boxes.

The children who have it the worst in our society are the ones without good strong fathers in their lives. It isn’t too much masculinity that ruins a lot of lives it is the lack of masculinity in lives and what some people are calling masculinity. Good strong men don’t take advantage of people, they stand up for others. They work hard to elevate themselves and their families, some start businesses where they hire people, build society, and make life better for everyone.

Good strong men have stood up to tyranny. We forget that all men didn’t get the vote that much earlier than women. I believe in the man being the head of the home because women have a big enough job being the heart of the home. I also believe we don’t demand respect, we command respect. A man that commands respect is what all men should aspire to and the type of man all women should aspire to marry and build a family with. A woman that commands respect, is what all men should aspire to marry and build a family with. If we build our families with a man we respect then our children have a father they can respect. If a man respects his wife then his children have a mother they will respect. If we respect ourselves then we will conduct ourselves in ways that continue to garner respect throughout our lives.

We have to be our own control boards, we have to decide how we will conduct ourselves, what choices we will make, and what principles we will stand behind and build our lives on.

If we have faith in ourselves, other people, and faith in a power greater than ourselves we can face the challenges that we will undoubtedly face in life. We don’t know when we may be brought to our knees, dealt an unfair hand, deal with malevolence, or unfairness.

The consequences of the choices you make can change your life in the blink of an eye, be sure of what you do before you do it, sometimes it can’t be undone. Unknown

Life isn’t fair, we don’t all start at the same starting line, we don’t have the same talents, but we have a life to live and make the best of. If we can live a life grateful for what we have, the opportunities that present themselves, the people we love, challenges that will help us grow and become better then hopefully we will get to the end of our lives surrounded by people we love who will know we did our best most of the time, and they will be grateful we were in their lives.

To be a blessing in the lives of our children, grandchildren, and on down the generations is what we should aspire to, and if we aren’t blessed with our own children we can still be a blessing to the generations that follow us.

We weren’t perfect parents; we tried to do the best we knew how to do. It is your turn to take on the mantle of husband and hopefully father. Doing your best is all anyone can ask. It isn’t easy to look in the mirror and ask if you really did your best, but it is an exercise that will help you know if you are building the life you want or if you need to make some changes. If you make the changes that make things better you will feel better about your life, and your life will have a positive trajectory. Keep control of the little things and the big things take care of themselves.

We don’t notice the impact of little choices in the short term that have a big impact on our life over the long term, but over time those choices add up. Unknown

Every choice comes with a consequence. Once you make a choice, you must accept responsibility. You cannot escape the consequences of your choices, whether you like them or not. Roy T. Bennett

One of the most important things that I have learned… is that life is all about choices. On every journey you take, you face choices. At every fork in the road, you make a choice. And it is those decisions that shape our lives. Mike DeWine

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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