Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

You cannot be all things to all people. Be unique. Be different. Give to others what you want yourself, and do what you were made to do. Robert Kiyosaki

We can’t be everything to everybody, and we have to be okay with that. Last night the group from the Border Crossings Course I took met to discuss our next steps. How will we use what we learned and take it out into the community? Some of the people are from groups whose focus is helping people with challenges of various sorts.

As a writer what is my focus? Is my focus only on developing the widest readership possible? Who am I writing for? I tried to articulate my vision as much as I have developed. I am trying to encourage people to use creativity in their lives and creativity feeds our soul. Making a good soup is as creative as painting.

I said the most creative, satisfying, and important thing I’ve done in my life is motherhood. How does that make people reading feel who are not mothers, will never be mothers, or had motherhood thrust upon them in brutal ways?

Yesterday I went to get my hair done by my hairdresser that I haven’t been to since the start of covid. I knew how his business had been, “closed down.” He asked about mine and I told him we’ve done okay. “I’m happy for you,” he said. I believe he meant it because if things aren’t going okay for people they won’t come in and get their hair done. Businesses need other businesses to do well so they can sell their product or provide their service. The better everyone in a community does the better the community does.

Why do I mention this? We all come from families and we are from a long unbroken chain. Even if we don’t become parents ourselves, parents have kept society going. Everyone does not need to reproduce, not everyone can, and maybe not everyone should. We may not get everything we want from life. We may have sorrows and crosses to bear that are almost impossible, and yet if this is our life we must bear it to go forward.

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. Maya Angelou

If I distill what I am trying to say down to the finest point I think I am writing about gratitude. I believe gratitude for what we have can help us to be better, do better, and get better. This is what I have to learn, practice, remember and so I write about it. Dealing with what life throws at us without bitterness. When people question us, confront us, or are offensive to us trying to be nondefensive is a good practice but a hard one. Becoming unoffendable is a goal, something I aspire to but it is also hard to remember at the moment.

I wrote out a mission statement when I started this blog:

To live life to the fullest with a grateful heart, and a positive attitude. To thrive with love, compassion, humor, and style while giving everything I have to those I love and the environment around me, and make it a better place for all. To write and speak the truth as I know it. To learn and grow, living my values with passion and purpose. To make sense of the world, relationships, creative energy, what we love, and what we fear. To be a catalyst to help others go ah-ha I’ve thought that too. To set goals and make things happen.

The questions we were asked last night are good ones. Why/who, what, and how. When we know why we know what we should focus on and what we shouldn’t focus on. As I focus on these questions I will see where I may be missing the mark and where I am hitting it.

Knowing who our ideal reader is and focusing on giving that reader the best experience possible is the goal. Figuring out who they are and what they want is hard. We cannot write for every reader, even if we think that would give us the widest reach. Some say the narrower we make our focus the better.

If I had to categorize who I think I am writing for I think I am writing for women and men, but mostly women who have lived a life, and now have time they might not know what to do with. They have choices but feel stuck. They have opportunities but might not recognize them. They may feel is this all there is? They are searching for something, an epiphany that will tell them what to do in the next act of their life. They are like me searching, cherry-picking from a multitude of beliefs, to find meaning, purpose, and see the beauty in the everyday. They know gratitude, saving ten percent of what they earn, and loving unconditionally is what they should do but it is hard, and we are human.

Will everyone who stumbles across my blog love it? Will it resonate with everyone? Of course not, and I have to be okay with that. I hope everyone that reads my blog will take what they like, what works for them, and leave the rest. Over time I hope I will improve as a writer, and as a person as I share the journey I am on. Good luck on each of your journeys, and may we keep each other company along the way.

Somebody didn’t wake up today, but you did. That’s enough reason to stop complaining, and that’s enough to be thankful for. Never let your troubles blind you to your daily blessings. Trent Shelton

Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance. Eckhart Tolle

Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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