Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

Who we marry is one of the most important decisions in life. Nathan Workman

How many of us put the cart before the horse. We want something but we don’t logically think out the steps it takes to get what we want.  Marriage is for many people one of the steps it takes to start building a life. We think we are focused on goals before we get married. Somehow for many of us getting married focused us on the path we wanted to take.

I could be wrong, it might only look like that because of the stages we go through, but when we get married we stand up as an adult. We are going forward as a new couple forging our way into the wilderness. We have pledged our troth and go forward to build a life.

It looks to me that many relationships get to a point where we either get married or go our separate ways. If having children is important, and to a lot of girls it is, and being married when we have them, and to a lot that is as well. Then we have to be okay with the institution of marriage and all it entails.

To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with. Mark Twain

If couples are ambitious and want to build something together, not just have separate jobs but build a business even if it is only a side hustle at first, getting married may be the first step. Do we want to tie our resources and credit rating to someone without a serious commitment?

It’s a bit of a problem for many of us that having children has a best before date, and building a life takes longer than we’d like. The dream of getting everything ready to have children has probably always been a pipe dream. We’ve probably always had to have faith in our relationship, selves, and life to bring forth a new person with all that entails.

The younger generation laments that we had it so easy when we were their age. It didn’t seem like it at the time. Looking back I wonder if we could have taken advantage of low house prices, but the interest rates were high. Hindsight is twenty-twenty and we’d all be rich if we could go back and do it over. Knowing what to do going forward is the trick. Having faith in oneself is a big thing. We can’t do big things if we don’t take big risks, one of the biggest risks we take is who we marry and have children with.

The marriage might not last twenty years, but child raising does if we have more than one child. If we aren’t willing to take a chance on life, on love, and on the future, we stay stuck. At some point, the potential partner will get sick of waiting to start their life, or stay and be resentful for the wasted potential of their life.

As a mother of marriage age children, I see their friends taking the plunge. It seems to me from what I see, marriage still makes a huge difference in the way life unfolds for young couples. Saying yes to marriage seems like saying yes to life, and the start of an adventure. Not saying yes to marriage seems like waiting for life to begin, and wondering when the adventure starts.

Do we need to say yes to life, love, and adventure?

Success in marriage is more than finding the right person; it is being the right person. Unknown

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage. Lao Tzu

How will you know if it’s the right decision if you never make it? Unknown

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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