Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas
Just for today. I will adjust myself to what is and not try to adjust everything to my desires. I will take my fate as it comes and fit myself to it. Sinclair L.D. Johnson
Last night I picked up “The Compound Effect” by Darren Hardy. The section I flipped to was goals, but one of the points he is making is that the compound effect doesn’t just work in the positive, it also works in the negative.
We may have little choice in the direction our life takes sometimes, but we do choose our behavior and certain behaviors lead us in certain directions. Loneliness is one of the things that cause us a lot of pain. Being lonely is not only about being alone. We can be lonely in a group. We can be lonely in a school filled with people. We can be lonely in a large family, and we can be lonely in our marriage.
One of the things we need to learn to do is to amuse ourselves. This may be something that is harder and harder for us to learn to do as we are stimulated from birth. “I’m bored,” was a dangerous thing to say on a farm. There was always something that needed to be done.
The amount of books some people read is amazing. Remember the saying, “There is no frigate like a book to take us lands away.” This is great for readers. Many people who love to read never have enough time to read. Pastimes are exactly that, activities to help people pass the time.
It may seem callous to say, people for the most part have to fix their own problems. The truth is if they don’t fix them who will? If we don’t know how to find a marriage partner we can find a matchmaker who may help us. Being married does not guarantee we won’t be lonely. It doesn’t guarantee we won’t be depressed. If marriage the most intimate of relationships doesn’t guarantee we won’t be lonely then what does?
There may be nothing that guarantees we won’t be lonely except finding something we can do that is so interesting we forget we are lonely. Some of us might eat when we are lonely, drink alcohol or turn to drugs. All of these will not make our life better.
Just for today, I will not worry for I have the tools and resources to deal with whatever comes my way, whenever it comes my way. Dina Kleiman
One of the organizations I think makes a huge positive impact is Alcoholics Anonymous and all the other Anonymous groups. One of the things they do is give people a platform to talk. A place to acknowledge their problems, people who will support them, and in turn they can help and support others. I imagine they are online these days. Online isn’t as good as in-person but it might be more assessable to a lot of people.
Back to the compound effect. The decisions we make in our lives will compound. Just like priming a pump our decisions and habits may take a while before they become evident but at some point, our decisions, actions, and habits propel us in a direction. If we don’t like the direction, we will have to change our decisions, habits, and actions.
The hardest thing in life is looking at someone, knowing what they should change, and not know how to help them. They have to help themselves, and we have to help ourselves.
Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Unknown
You don’t get over an addiction by stopping using. You recover by creating a new life where it is easier to not use. If you don’t create a new life, then all the factors that brought you to your addiction will catch up with you again. Unknown
It’s up to you today to start making healthy choices. Not choices that are just healthy for your body, but healthy for your mind. Steve Maraboli
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