What makes happiness and meaning? Life isn’t a dress rehearsal. We only go this way once. Are we living our life the best way we know how? We won’t be perfect; can we do the best we can?

Are we living our life doing the best we know how to do? We won't be perfect; can we do the best we can? What makes happiness and meaning? Life isn't a dress rehearsal.

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life. Albert Camus

Last night was another great night at Toastmasters. It is a positive, grateful group and it makes me more positive and grateful to be part of it. We are influenced by the company we keep, and when we have positive groups to belong to they make our lives better.

One of the things we have available to us through YouTube is positive speakers on every subject. If there is something we want to learn about chances are someone is talking about it.

We all want to be significant but Victor Frankl warned about spending our life searching for meaning. When we search for something it means we don’t have it.

Don’t aim at success – the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue. Victor Frankl

If we are not to pursue happiness and success how will we ever get it? What we really want to find is meaning according to Victor Frankl. We can find meaning by connecting ourselves to something greater.

We may pursuit knowledge, commit to caring for others through volunteer work, dedicate ourselves to our families, pursuit being of service to the world and to others and somewhere in this we may find meaning, purpose, joy, and happiness. If we seek beauty, love, justice, contribution, connection, we may find meaning and happiness. If we seek meaning and happiness are we likely to find beauty, love, justice, contribution, or connection? All of these may seem so insignificant because of our greater search for meaning and happiness we discard as unworthy all the avenues that could give us meaning and happiness.

We need to do what is important in our life not because they will bring us meaning and happiness but because they are important in their own right. If meaning and happiness find us as we are busy doing the next important thing we get an extra bonus. Realizing we are experiencing moments of meaning and happiness amidst our daily life are like sparks of light in our life.

We may not appreciate the sparks of light when everything around us is light, they may only be reflected back to us in the darkness. This may be why some of the most profound words written are written by those who have endured hardship, not lived lives of ease.

This is probably why we would never choose our hardships and times of pain, but when we look back we wouldn’t want to give back the gifts we got from going through those hard times. As Maya Angelou’s title says I Wouldn’t Take Nothing for My Journey Now. If we’ve lived through highs and lows, good times and bad, challenges, hardships, loss and pain, we’ve learned things we could learn no other way. All gifts do not come wrapped in nice packages.

We may spend our whole lives asking what makes happiness. Do we feel moments of meaning, purpose, and happiness amidst the joys and sorrows of daily life?

The meaning of life is happiness. Hard question is not, what is meaning of life? No, hard question is what makes happiness. This is the question all human beings must try to answer: What make true happiness? Dalai Lama XlV

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Wouldn’t Take Nothing for My Journey Now Paperback – Oct 1 1994

by Maya Angelou (Author) 4.6 out of 5 stars 17 ratings


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All things happen in the present moment. This is where our power lies. Are we making the best choices right now?

Are we making the best choices right now? All things happen in the present moment. This is where our power lies.

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

The point of power is always in the present moment. Louise L. Hay

This morning as I do my morning reading I open The Motivation Manifesto by Brendan Burchard. He is talking about the roles we play in our lives and asks the question are we being attentive to the roles we play in our life?

We are the observer in our life. When we take a detached view of our life is it the life we should be living? Are we making the right decisions for our life, are we making important things important?

We are the director of our life. Are the scenes of our life unfolding as we would like? Do we have the right characters playing the right parts in our life? If we are not happy with the current story in our lives, what do we have to do to change that? Do we focus on the parts of the story we love the most, is our story more negative or positive, would we like it to be different? When we play various roles in our life are we the person we want to be? Are we the supportive loving spouse, the encouraging parent, fearless as we go after our dreams? As the director we can change the story arc of our lives, will we be strong or weak, noble or selfish, flighty or grounded? What will we become in the next scene in our lives? Are we the hero of our own lives, or bit players in someone else’s?

We are the guardians of our mind, body, and soul. Protecting ourselves from negative information, people, habits, and thoughts is our responsibility. What we consume, what activities we pursue, and the entertainment we engage in is our choice We are our own control board. How much sleep to get, exercise to engage in, and how much water we drink are all choices we make. Do the people we allow in our lives add or detract from our lives. We can’t choose our family but we do choose who we have as friends, and we are likely to be very much like those we associate with. We can choose to join groups and organizations where people are positive and inspiring.

Nothing ever happened in the past; it happened in the Now. Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the Now. Eckhart Tolle

We are the warrior in our life. If our dreams are to come true we will make them come true. Our role may not be out in the world we may be mother bear of our home, the guardian of our home and children. One of the things that I am learning is how early sexual experiences are impacting our children, boys and girls alike. It is not just our girls we need to keep from experimenting with sex too early. I could be wrong but too early sexual activity seems to me to be home and societal problems. Why are we failing our children in these fundamental ways?

We are a lover in our life. Lovers shine attention and adoration on others. Life is not sweet and there is little to celebrate unless we have people in our lives we love. This may be our most difficult role, but it is also the role we get the most from. One of the ways we can be better lovers is to learn the love languages of those we love. Do they feel most loved when we do acts of service for them, or spend time with them, or give them gifts, or words of encouragement, or touch them? If we can embrace our role as lover we can love those around us and make them feel loved, appreciated, accepted, respected, and ready to give their gifts to the world.

We are the leader in our lives. What can we do to improve our circle of influence? This circle of influence may be our family, our job, our community? What can we do to spot those areas of need, to lift those around us, to unite people in meaningful struggle and service? Do we have an attitude of “If it is to be, it is up to me?”

We will never master all of these roles, all of the time, but we can work to enact them with more presence and power. If we are going to embrace each of these roles we need to do it in the Now. If we are checked out of today because we are thinking about the future or the past we miss the present. Only be living today, enjoying the blessings of today and improving today, because now is all there is, can we make our life better.

Are we embracing today with all it entails? Are we giving all we have to give to those we have to give it to? Are we the hero in our story, fighting the good fight, and making a difference? Are there changes we want and need to make? They can only be made in the present; nothing can change in the past, all our power is in the present moment.  What kind of person and what kind of experiences do we want to manifest right now?

Stop acting as if life is a rehearsal. Live this day as if it were your last. The past is over and gone. The future is not guaranteed. Wayne Dyer

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The Motivation Manifesto: 9 Declarations to Claim Your Personal Power Hardcover – Oct 28 2014

by Brendon Burchard (Author) 4.5 out of 5 stars 49 ratings


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Reading books and interpreting our dreams. Is someone trying to tell us something?

Is someone trying to tell us something? Reading books and interpreting our dreams.

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

I have had dreams, and I’ve had nightmares. I overcame the nightmares because of my dreams. Jonas Salk

Do our dreams tell us anything? I’ve been having really weird dreams and most of them are about not being ready to do the job I had years ago. Last night my horse was in my dream, we were in a race and we were one of three finalists. We were given two sheets of paper which I crumpled up and put in my pocket. My horse broke a rein but I had a back-up one on the bridal. My dream ended before the final competition. I never read the crumpled paper so I don’t know what it was telling me.

My dreams are about moving forward, worrying about being unprepared, facing the next challenge, resourcefulness, and trusting that life will unfold how it will and I will be able to handle it. At least this is my interpretation.

My cousin just received a copy of my unpublished novel. I sent her a hard copy by mail and she is reading a published novel by a cousin on her Mother’s side. She says she can hardly put it down. This is the debut memoir by author Jesse Thistle called From the Ashes My Story of Being Metis, Homeless and Finding My Way.

I didn’t have time to pick it up last night. It sounds like a good book club pick. We love the books we can discuss at length. This is what book clubs are for, we can look at different sides of a common story and the stories we love the most are ones where people overcome challenges and with perseverance build their lives. When the lives lived also resonate with something in our own lives it makes it all the more powerful.

My mother is reading a memoir about an English bride who came to Canada after World War 1 to see the golden wheat fields. She was planning to go back to England when the dirty thirties hit. She never got back to England. Mom lived through those days on the prairie in Saskatchewan as a child. Mom couldn’t remember the title or author when I spoke to her.

The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you’ll go. Dr. Seuss

Books are a window into the world that no other medium quite achieves. We are immersed in the thoughts of the characters, we know what they know, we see what they see, and we understand what they understand. Movies are removed from that connection as we are only watching from afar.

My cousin and I were laughing about how grateful we are for reading glasses. On the weekend my husband and I ended up in a restaurant and I was fumbling for the reading glasses in my purse only to find they weren’t there. My husband had to read the menu to me. How terrible it would be if reading was over for us because reading glasses didn’t exist.

Reading glasses are a pain and they get in the way, giving a speech with reading glasses is hard. Of course, if we need notes it is impossible to give a speech without them. How many lives would be so much emptier if they didn’t have books to read? My mom spends a lot of time reading.

For people who cannot read or who prefer to listen, we have audiobooks. I’ve listened to an audiobook gardening. It was Jordan Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life and it made going out to the garden a dual win. This year I didn’t listen to a book while I gardened and I didn’t do as much gardening.

We need to ask ourselves have we read a good book lately. If not, why not? The other question is, are our dreams telling us something? Are we working out some of the questions in our lives, in our dreams? What if books and dreams are both trying to teach us something?

Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. Mahatma Gandhi

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From the Ashes: My Story of Being Métis, Homeless, and Finding My Way Paperback – Aug 6 2019

by Jesse Thistle (Author) 4.9 out of 5 stars 11 ratings#1 Best Sellerin Education


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Gratitude and Thanksgiving. Celebration with food and wine, how divine?

Celebration with food and wine, how divine. Gratitude and Thanksgiving.

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our Thanksgiving. W.T. Purkiser

Thanksgiving brought us a bright and glorious weekend.  Three birthdays and Thanksgiving converged and we celebrated on Sunday with dinner, laughs, and a groaning table. It was a fun and happy evening.

There is so much to be grateful for when we are lucky enough to get together and enjoy each other’s company. My sister-in-law came from a wedding celebration and showed us pictures of the radiant bride and happy groom.

Yesterday I called Mom and it is with a grateful heart I realize how lucky I am to still be able to make that Thanksgiving Day call. She went to a 90th birthday celebration for a friend the day before.

I’m looking at my post from last year. We didn’t celebrate Thanksgiving with a big dinner at our house. Everyone was off doing their own thing and the birthdays got celebrated the next week. My husband and I went for a long walk and then a lovely dinner. Yesterday we ended up talking and laughing over lunch in a nice restaurant. “I thought it would be nicer than our usual,” my husband said.

Last year I wrote:

Everything works in my life because of the love, support, and connection my husband and I have. We are entering stages of our life we don’t want to enter. Luckily we have each other and we will laugh and enjoy all that comes with it. As we weather the trials and tribulations with as much good humor as we can muster we will continue to grow together. We are a team; we can’t imagine not being a team. Our life only works as a team.

We need to balance individual goals and couple goals. This is our time, this is our life, we need to think about what we want and bring it into fruition. We can’t control a lot of things, we have to embrace insecurity, we also have to embrace each other and make the best of what we have, what we want, and what will be.

If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough. Meister Eckhart

It is all still true. Our children are making the decisions we once agonized over. When do we start a family, where do we live, will we be able to afford our own home?

If we can weather the storms, uncertainties, challenges we see coming and the ones we don’t see coming we can get from here to there as a couple. There is no happily ever after, not in the way people think. It is happily meeting the challenges of life as they come up, meeting each other’s needs, finding joy every day, pushing ourselves to take the next step and being the best we can be for our partners, families, and ourselves.

Is it in building a life and family we find meaning and purpose? It is hard to think of a better way to wring more joy out of life than to sit down to a family dinner, full of warmth, humor, love, joy, and accomplishment and not feel full of pride, contentment, and that it is all worth it.

Our children, nieces, and nephews bring in partners, and later as grandchildren join us our circles widen. Our hearts embrace everyone. When there is no longer room for everyone at one table we will need to make other arrangements, but we can always have room in our hearts.

Some day we may hear, “do I have to sit at the kiddy table?”

Thanksgiving is a time of togetherness and gratitude. Nigel Hamilton

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Thanks!: How Practicing Gratitude Can Make You Happier Paperback – Nov 6 2008

by Robert Emmons (Author) 5.0 out of 5 stars 2 ratings


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Now is all there is, living in the present. Accept what we cannot change because it is what it is.

Accept what we cannot change because it is what it is. Now is all there is, living in the present.

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

Live in the present; launch yourself on every wave, find eternity in each moment. Henry David Thoreau

Now is all there is! We’ve heard it, we know it’s true but it is easy to have our thoughts everywhere but on Now. this very moment. It is this moment where life happens.

I remember reading of a woman getting the chance to go back to a time in her life. She chose to go back to one of her favorite birthdays but what she found was everyone hurrying and scurrying, no one had time to spend with her.

We have to be careful that in trying to do things for other people we aren’t so busy we have no time for them.

Tomorrow is my husband’s birthday; can I get everything done today so tomorrow can be a day where I am free for whatever he may want to do? There is a dinner to prepare for Sunday but if I can get the shopping done today then tomorrow is free.

It is easy to get overwhelmed thinking about what we have to do. It is easy to spend our time thinking of what has happened, what might happen, or what we hope won’t happen. What about right now? This very moment is our life? Are we enjoying what is happening at this very moment, sipping a coffee, writing words, enjoying the still small hours of the day before everyone is up? The temperature is comfortable, the chair is supportive, and the keyboard is responsive. Now is great, and often the now is great, but we infringe on Now with all the burdens of yesterday, tomorrow, and even later today. What if we deal with each moment as it comes?

Our days blur into one another if we do not savor the moments. In Practicing the Power of Now Eckhart Tolle asks what problems do we have at this moment? He says it is impossible to have a problem when our attention is fully in the Now. A situation has to be dealt with or accepted. Why make it into a problem? “Problem” means that we are dwelling on a situation mentally without there being a true intention or possibility of taking action now. Or we are carrying in our mind the insane burden of a hundred things that we will or may have to do in the future instead of focusing on the one thing that we can do now.

Wherever you are be all there. Jim Elliot

I have to pause and take my hands off the keyboard to sip my coffee. Eckhart Tolle tells us when we don’t create problems; we don’t create pain for ourselves. We need to accept that things are the way they are and that they can’t be different than how they are. When we are willing to accept reality just the way it is we have peace. It is what it is and if it is to be different we will change it in the future but we can’t do that until that future becomes the now.

This is easy to write but not so easy to do. If we can quit beating ourselves up for mistakes we made, and know going forward we can change what we can change, and the rest we need to accept. Surrendering to what is can be the way through what we cannot change. Maybe we need to surrender to grief, despair, loneliness, or whatever form our suffering takes. Can we witness it without labeling it mentally, and embrace it? He tells us the miracle of surrender transmutes deep suffering into deep peace.

There are many ways we try to escape our pain, work, drink, drugs, anger, food, projection, suppression, but they don’t free us from the pain. Suffering does not diminish in intensity when we don’t face it. When we turn it inward it becomes unconscious. When we deny emotional pain everything we do becomes contaminated by it. We broadcast it as the energy we emanate and others will pick up on it subliminally.

Turning away from pain doesn’t work. We need to face it, feel it fully, and express it but not in anger toward someone else. We need to give all of our attention to the feeling, not to the person, event, or situation that caused it. When we find ways to express it we move through it, we feel it. As we do this we are bringing light into the darkness.

Many great works of art, music, dance, or other creative expressions are expressions of pain, grief, and sorrow. Through expression, the pain is transmuted into something outside of ourselves. Sometimes this expression is a thing of beauty. Other lives may be touched by our expression.

Are we living in the Now? Are we finding ways to surrender to our feelings and express them?

If you are depressed, you are living in the past, if you are anxious, you are living in the future, if you are at peace, you are living in the present. Lao Tzu

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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Practicing the Power of Now: Essential Teachings, Meditations, and Exercises from the Power of Now Hardcover – Oct 5 2001

by Eckhart Tolle (Author) 4.6 out of 5 stars 80 ratings


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Serendipity, synchronicity, chance, luck, meaningful coincidence, or magic?

Magic or serendipity, synchronicity, chance, luck or meaningful coincidence?

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

Sweet serendipity… that unexpected meeting that changes your life. Unknown

Last night instead of going to the gym I shopped for the birthday people. We’ll celebrate three birthdays and Thanksgiving this weekend with one dinner. Three names on one cake, or three cakes? I’ve opted for one cake.

It was my hope I could get something for each of them at one store. It worked and as I was cashing out I heard someone call my name. My friend and I usually attend the Horticultural meetings together but the night before a Toastmaster’s responsibility prevented me from attending. Here she was, we walked to a coffee shop across the way. There we sat, talked and laughed away the evening. She showed me a picture of her God son’s new baby being held by his fifteen year old sister.

A chance meeting is serendipity working in our lives. We are taking my husband out to breakfast for his birthday. I was hoping to take him to a new restaurant but couldn’t think of one. My friend highly recommended a new breakfast restaurant close to us. When she mentioned it I remember my daughter and I seeing it but it didn’t register when I was thinking of restaurants.

We never know how serendipity and synchronicity will work in our lives. When we change up our patterns is when we are told serendipity is more likely to show up.  Can we make room for more serendipity in our lives?

Do we ask questions rather than worrying, and are we open to how the answer appears?

Serendipity: Happy accident or pleasant surprise, the accident of finding something good without looking. Unknown

We need to get out among people. Opportunities come in the form of people.

Can we release judgment on how we thought it would be or should be? If we hold too tightly to our vision we may miss opportunities in front of us.

Can we stop acting like a victim? Carolyn Miss tells us, “power is the foundation of health and any time you’re acting like a victim, you’re losing power.”

Ask better questions. What’s the best question we can ask? What are the possibilities? Are we willing to say I don’t know and be open to the answers that come?

Are we getting out of our comfort zone? We may find being vulnerable scary but isn’t that where the adventure is? Are we saying yes to life?

Is there a bigger picture we aren’t seeing? At some point, we may be able to connect the dots and see how synchronicity and serendipity worked in our lives.

Do we recognize we can learn something from everyone we meet?

Are we willing to listen to our gut, listen to our intuition?

Can we realize that we are not at the end of our story? When one door closes another door opens. Sometimes what we get out of life is more than we’d planned for ourselves.

Trust that everything is working for our highest good. This is a tough one, but sometimes we can learn lessons no other way. Can we train our mind to see the good in everything? Can we see the silver lining?

Can we realize that Life is essentially a learning experience; there is something to learn in every situation?

Are we grateful for everything in our lives? Are we making room in our lives for serendipity?

Serendipity is the way to make discoveries, by accident but also by sagacity, of things one is not in quest of. Based on experience, knowledge, it is the creative exploitation of the unforeseen. Adrian Bejan

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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Serendipity: How to Attract a Life You Love Paperback – Mar 12 2018

by Rosenthal MScEd, Joshua (Author) 5.0 out of 5 stars 1 rating


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Forgiving ourselves and others. Let’s celebrate a day of atonement and be set free of our burdens and resentments.

Let's celebrate a day of atonement and be set free of our burdens and resentments. Forgiving ourselves and others.

Our Father forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

Mathew 6:9

Wouldn’t we all benefit if we celebrated a day of atonement? We’ve all made mistakes, said things that hurt others, misinterpreted things, acted perversely, even wickedly, framed lies and been violent.

The prayer of atonement:

We have sinned, we have acted treacherously. We have robbed, we have spoken slander. We have acted perversely, we have acted wickedly. have acted presumptuously, we have been violent, we have framed lies.

What if we were to seek out each person we have frustrated, angered, misused, mistreated, misunderstood, slandered, misled, or many other ways we have mistreated others, in thoughtless or mean ways.

How many relationships could be healed if every year we asked for forgiveness, and every year we forgave those who wronged us?

Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. Unknown

We may feel we are not strong enough to forgive because what was done seems unforgivable. What is the cost of carrying that weight around? Forgiveness is not for the offender, it is for the offended to release the burden they are carrying

Everett Worthington, a pioneer clinical psychologist in the field of forgiveness, proposes a method for forgiveness he calls the REACH method.

R is for RECALL of the hurt.

Visualize the event while taking deep breaths to steady ourselves emotionally. We are to acknowledge our inner pain but make an effort to overcome it by recalling the incident as objectively as possible. We need to separate our anger, from ourselves. We need to find a way to express this anger in a non-hurtful way without yelling or attacking. We need to do our best to avoid judgment and focus on letting the resentment go.

E is for EMPATHISE with the person who hurt us.

We need to remember we are all capable of hurtful behavior. Can we see what happened from the offender’s point of view? Can we replace anger with compassion?

A is for the ALTRUISTIC gift of forgiveness.

Can we give the gift of forgiveness freely, not grudgingly? If we are forgiven as we forgive perhaps we can focus on the positive results of freeing ourselves from pain and bitterness.

C is for the COMMITMENT to forgive.

First, we must forgive ourselves for our part in the situation. Sometimes this is the hardest part. If we can put our forgiveness into words by writing them out we will be more committed to the action of forgiveness.

H is for HOLDING onto that forgiveness.

We have forgiven but we have to remember we forgave them when the memories come flooding back into our mind. We need to focus on the good things the offender has brought into our lives and not the offense we have forgiven.

When we control our thoughts we control our life. We can live our lives harboring resentment, becoming bitter and twisted, or we can forgive. It’s our choice; no one will force us to forgive someone for large or small offenses. We can go forward free of our burdens, or continue to carry them. When we forgive someone it doesn’t make as big a difference in their life as it does in ours.

It is in our own self-interest to forgive. It is in our own self-interest to acknowledge the wrongs we have done to others and make amends, to atone for our mistakes.

Is there a way we can bring forgiveness of ourselves and others into our life?

A Buddhist prayer of forgiveness:

If I have harmed anyone in any way either knowingly or unknowingly through my own confusions I ask their forgiveness. If anyone has harmed me in any way either knowingly or unknowingly through their own confusions I forgive them. And if there is a situation I am not yet ready to forgive I forgive myself for that. For all the ways that I harm myself, negate, doubt, belittle myself through my own confusions I forgive myself.

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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Ho’oponopono: The Hawaiian Forgiveness Ritual as the Key to Your Life’s Fulfillment Paperback – Sep 1 2012

by Ulrich E. Duprée (Author) 4.8 out of 5 stars 22 ratings


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Is doubt killing our dreams? Can we be fearless as we go after our goals?

Can we be fearless as we go after our goals? Is doubt killing our dreams?

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

If you have a heartbeat, there’s still time for your dreams. Unknown

When we roll over when the alarm rings, we’ve already started our day off on the wrong foot. Do we ever feel we’ve caught up when we don’t get up on time? Any excuse will do, it’s too dark, the TV was on too late, laughter from somewhere was too loud. 

No matter whom else I may want to blame, the blame ends with me. I didn’t do what I knew I should do. The extra minutes or hour didn’t give me what those extra minutes or that extra hour would have given me to get myself started and fit in my morning routine.

Our life can be just like my morning. We didn’t get to this or that because… It doesn’t matter what our because is, sooner or later we have to accept the fact we didn’t want something bad enough to make a plan, to create a habit, or to do the work to make it happen.

Sometimes we do part of the work and then it stalls. We may need to dig deep to have the courage for the next step. Maybe the next step will cost us time, money, or put our self and our abilities on the line. People will be able to judge our work.

We read of artists who got up the courage to perform in front of people who said don’t quit your day job, you’ll never make it as a… Some of them quit, but some of them went on to become big stars. What is the difference between those who listen when they are told you can’t sing, write, dance, start a business, play a sport, make it in university and those who say I’ll show you?

I’ve never been one of the “I’ll show you types,” but I’ve also never had anyone tell me I couldn’t do whatever.

Good things happen when you start taking small steps toward your dreams. Unknown

This blog came about because of encouragement from my son, “every writer should have a blog.”

“Every novel should have an editor.” It is hard for me to come up with the money to have someone critique my work. I’ve waffled, I’ll edit it as well as I can I tell myself before I pay an editor. I’ve given a date to my son when I hope to publish. There I’ve used that word hope – am I waffling?

My son tells me just put it out there and write the next one. Quit wasting so much time on editing, and editing again.

It took me a long time to send out my novel to a cousin who says she’ll read it. I value her feedback, what she thinks is important to me.

It is easy to let days and weeks slip by without working on our dreams. They often cost money, and that is where we stumble. If we are going to invest in our dream what else is not being invested in?

We often know what the next step is, but we hesitate to take it. Are we more content thinking what might have been, than actually knowing? Is doubt killing our dreams?

If we don’t risk failure we don’t risk success. We must decide we will take the chance to fail often, fail bigger. We can’t expect to achieve our goals if we aren’t willing to put ourselves on the line, mere hope is not a plan. At some point, we must put ourselves out there to sink or swim, and as we do it, again and again, we get okay with winning some and losing some.

If we put enough out there some of it will stick. If we only think we can do one thing it has to be so good that we hesitate, waffle and don’t execute.

We make our dreams come true by doing, not dreaming about doing. What can we do today to move closer to what we want?

Be a fearless person. Do not hesitate to chase after the things that set your soul on fire. Unknown

Put all your excuses aside and remember that you are capable. Zig Zigler

Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will. Suzy Kassem

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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The Motivation Myth: How High Achievers Really Set Themselves Up to Win Hardcover – Jan 9 2018

by Jeff Haden (Author) 4.6 out of 5 stars 9 ratings


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Giving our gifts and our love. Holding back our love and gifts hurts ourselves.

Holding back our love and our gifts hurts ourselves. Giving our gifts and our love.

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thoams

Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love. Mother Teresa

There is power in doing. In starting something with certainty, we don’t know how things will end up, but we can start.

We can start the painting, novel, building a house, marriage, starting a family, business, job, buying a home, or begin a remodeling project. Every one of these takes faith and courage to some degree.

Most of us didn’t know how life would unfold when we took our marriage vows or started a family, but we did have faith that life would work out. We had faith that every day for eighteen or twenty years and even longer we could feed our children, every day.

People have headed off to new countries with little but hope in their hearts and a willingness to work and build a life. Many of these people have built amazing lives. We give ourselves to the world, our children to the world, and our talents to the world.

Some artists like Vincent Van Gogh are not appreciated in their own time. Aren’t we glad he was willing to give his gifts and that they didn’t die with him? My husband told me of a YouTube video of a woman illegally singing in the subway and the police were supposed to remove her. She started to sing and one of the officers recorded her, she’s a phenomenal singer. She was giving her gift. Maybe a way will be found for her to give her gift in a larger way.

No beauty shines brighter than that of a good heart. Unknown

All my life I was told The Lord works in mysterious ways. What if for this woman what was one of her darkest days, being evicted from the subway is what turns her life and purpose around?

Is our purpose in life to give our gifts? Our children are a gift, our productivity is a gift, service is a gift, producing the food to feed people is a gift, our talents are a gift. What if our purpose is to pour ourselves out in the service of each other?

As we give our gifts we may think they are not appreciated, maybe we should hold back, but when we don’t give our gifts to the world and each other, we suffer. We do not live in the fullness of life. If we do not love fully we suffer, we may think we’ll protect ourselves from hurt by not loving, but we hurt ourselves. We need to love and give with open hearts.

What if it’s true that the faults we see in others are the faults we need to work on in ourselves? What if it is only by changing ourselves that we can effect change? What if by giving our gifts to the world, and working on our own negative traits we are doing what we are supposed to do?

Only by giving are you able to receive more than you already have. Unknown

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire (20th Anniversary Edition) Paperback – Feb 1 2017

by David Deida (Author) 4.4 out of 5 stars 76 ratings


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Rekindling love, falling in love with the same person over, and over again.

Falling in love with the same person over, and over again. Rekindling love.

Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas

The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart. Helen Keller

What an honor it is when we celebrate with happy couples declaring their vows to each other. When it’s a couple that finds each other after many years and completes what seems the circle of their lives with I Do it seems more special. Now as they start out as Mr. & Mrs. to the delight of all who have known them through the trials and tribulations of life our hearts are gladdened, and we believe more strongly in the power of love.

Such was our day, yesterday. The officiate said his view of love is we have “natural love” with the families we are born into. We have “unnatural love” with those we chose to love. It is a selfish love when we chose to love someone because it is about how they make us feel. This is the love we have to tend to, we have to continue to do what makes them feel drawn to us, and they will hopefully keep doing what drew us to them. 

This is the love that goes through the cycles of marriage. As a speaker on a Ted Talk said, some of us have many marriages; some of us have these marriages with the same person. As we go through the cycles in marriage we fall in love again, and again, hopefully with the same person.

Yesterday speaking to a friend she said a friend’s parents were in ill health. They didn’t want to live without each other, they couldn’t take care of each other, and they didn’t want to be cared for by others. One had cancer, one had heart problems, they chose to petition for euthanasia. They had a family celebration where everyone came together, said their goodbyes, and a doctor injected them and they peacefully said goodbye to the world lying in their bed, holding hands.

Our love stories must end, it seems like a good ending to me. When we go as far as we can with our love story and both are ready to exit this life, exiting together seems better. An aunt and uncle of mine exited about two weeks apart. Would they have preferred the choice to leave together?

Love always cures people – both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it. Karl Menninger

If we can love each other in the beauty of youth, the challenges that come with raising children or just building a life, the challenges of getting old, the ups and downs life inevitably brings, and the push and pull of romantic attraction. If we enjoy the deeper beauty of our partner as surface beauty fades, we will have lived with all that marriage brings.

Rekindling love after years apart or in a marriage means focusing on each other. Sometimes we need to recognize love is a verb, and actively love each other every day, not just love each other when we feel like it.

If we can respect each other, love each other, and treat each other with kindness and appreciation every day. We may need to learn what respect looks like to each other, we may need to learn each other’s love languages so when we are trying to give them love we do it in a way they respond to. We need to accept and appreciate our partners how they are, not how we may wish they were. We may need to appreciate and accept ourselves. We are good enough to deserve love, our partner is good enough to deserve love, and if we once had a wonderful loving relationship we can probably, if we really want to, have that again.

Are we living in the fullness of love?

The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in. Morrie Schwartz

If you keep giving up on people so quickly, you’re gonna miss out on something great. Robin, from How I Met Your Mother

Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time. Maya Angelou

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you will come back and read some more. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.

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The 5 Love Languages Paperback – Jan 1 2015

by Gary Chapman (Author) 4.7 out of 5 stars 593 ratings#1 Best Sellerin Marriage


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