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You just have to be yourself and go full with confidence and be courageous. Gabby Douglas
Confidence is feeling you can get another job if you leave the one you hate. It is believing you can head off to parts unknown to build a life. Believing you can build a life wherever you are, that you can bloom where you are planted.
There is not one recipe for happy productive lives. If we stay in the area we were born we can build happy, productive lives. We may try our hand at many things or become an expert at one. Our lives are up to us, we make our choices but sometimes after we make certain choices we begin to feel stuck.
Some choices we are happy with, but outside circumstances are changing, and we must change with them. We may love our job and the life we’ve built but the company is moving away, shutting-down, downsizing, or closing. Retirement looms and another set of choices must be made.
We need confidence and courage to deal with life. We can make all the seemingly right decisions and still find our self in uncomfortable situations we never thought we would be in.
My son recently introduced me to a blog called Mr. Money Mustache. It’s a money blog about retiring early, he started it in 2011 and has with his wife and child been living on $25,000.00 a year. This does not include business expenses. When I looked up the blog, the first post I saw was he and his wife are now divorced. My son was shocked.
One of the reasons given for the early retirement was so they could raise their son together. How hard it must be when the decisions made bring you to the one decision you thought you would never make. It takes courage to leave a marriage; it takes courage to make a bad marriage better, a cold marriage warm.
Decision is a risk rooted in the courage of being free. Paul Tillich
One of the problems with writing a blog is we may seem like hypocrites because we can’t possibly follow all the good advice we write about. Everyone who is married is in one of the four seasons of marriage, spring, summer, fall, or winter. It might be very hard to discern if a winter marriage is dead or just dormant. Is it beyond repair or a little tender loving care would revive it? It takes courage to leave, and it takes courage to stay and make it better.
All of our decisions may be second-guessed by our self and others. Its part of life knowing when we turned left, it might have been better if we turned right. Not making the decision is when we don’t live with courage and confidence.
We may have to live with the knowledge we didn’t make the best decision. Making a decision is better than being stuck.
I look at the television show where couples are shown three houses and they have to pick one to make their home. Did they really only look at three homes? Probably not, but we are told more choice does not make us happier; it makes it harder for us to choose. Sometimes the choice is so hard we don’t make a choice, by not making a choice we don’t move forward in our life.
Mr. Money Mustache was told to get an education and he did, he became a software engineer. He retired from that at age thirty-one and now does carpentry which he loves. Because he lives frugally he wouldn’t need to work, but he has given himself the freedom to do something he loves.
Frugality to him equals freedom. To some people being that frugal would be oppressive. Last night I listened to my son, his girlfriend and my daughter discussing how much money could be saved over ten years if going out for coffee was given up.
Going for coffee may be one of the ways we spend our fifteen hours of uninterrupted couple time. It might make sense on paper, but it might be the worst decision, and very expensive if giving up a little out every day makes life much less enjoyable.
Coloring our hair is also expensive but not something many women especially, are willing to give up. Some of us embrace our gray hair, and if you do, I applaud you. If you don’t and a little box of hair color, or a trip to the hair salon, makes you feel like you, and not a little old lady when you look in the mirror. Then, by all means, color your hair.
Frugality has its place but we need to make decisions that make us feel good. This is our life, it is easy to look at other peoples choices and question them. When we look at our own lives and question our choices, this is where we find benefit. Building our life with courage and confidence is the way to build a good life. My choices are not your choices, and if we are to have a happy life we have to be confident in making unpopular choices sometimes.
It may be leaving a stable job, career or business to take a chance on a dream. We regret the things we don’t do more than the things we do. We can always pick ourselves up and dust ourselves off if things don’t work out. The saddest words are what if, but when faced with a fork in the road we can only choose one of them. We may think we can go back and choose the other path, sometimes we can, often we can’t.
It is with confidence and courage we must make our choices. Not choosing is still a choice. Is there a choice looming in your life?
Everything you want is on the other side of fear. Jack Canfield
Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear Kindle Edition